👋 The unsupported use case of a disordered*, mediocre midlife in St. Johns, Oregon—now with added global pandemic and climate crisis.
🕛 Struggling with the hours-at-a-time, incessant barking of the dog next door; struggling with all of this; struggling to understand parts of a new treatment plan for chronic rhinitis; struggling with a sudden, somewhat epic, days-long fatigue; struggling with sussing out a fifteen-year-old tax question; struggling with atypically-frequent sensory hells; struggling with trying to find who under my health plan can provide an official developmental coordination disorder diagnosis; struggling with life being little more than an empty and mechanical series of putting tabs A into slots B; struggling with every day once again being a too long, too empty blursday; struggling for a way to keep up with friends and acquaintances without subjecting myself to social media; struggling with the fact that the dreary weather and changed clocks have put daily evening walks out of reach; struggling with yet another year in my fifties; struggling to even want to bother trying to read a growing pile of hundreds of autism research papers; and struggling with nostalgia for how much easier was 2020 for me.
📚 I’m reading The Topography of Wellness: How Health and Disease Shaped the American Landscape by Sara Jensen Carr during the day and The Actual Star by Monica Byrne at night (having paused The 1619 Project: A New Origin Story edited by Nikole Hannah-Jones because my OverDrive loan expired), having finished The Uses of Disorder: Personal Identity and City Life by Richard Sennett and Far from the Light of Heaven by Tade Thompson; I’ve a long list of ebooks to buy or borrow, and a short one of books I’ve in hand to read next.
📺 This week I’m watching 4400, The Book of Boba Fett, DC’s Legends of Tomorrow, Star Trek: Prodigy, and Nancy Drew; watching The World According to Jeff Goldblum on weekday and weekend mornings; rewatching The Prisoner; and once more trying to (re)watch Farscape.
📽️ In recent weeks, I’ve rewatched Space Sweepers (the best movie of last year), The Matrix, The Matrix Reloaded, The Matrix Revolutions, Desk Set, The Martian, School of Rock, and Inherit the Wind; and seen Colossal, The Matrix Resurrections, Silent Night, Doors, Cloud Atlas, Spider-Man: No Way Home in my first theater experience since the start of the pandemic, The Tragedy of Macbeth, Eternals, and Coherence.
🎧 My rotation of late has included Evalyn, Sleepover, Billie Eilish, and (finally, it’s out) the Station Eleven score.
📻 I’m listening regularly to Wait Wait…Don’t Tell Me! and Station Eleven: The Podcast; awaiting the next seasons of 1800 Seconds on Autism, Technopolis, Star Trek: The Pod Directive, and For All Mankind: The Official Podcast; and still missing Social Distance.
🗞️ I’ve reversed having replaced almost all of my newsletter subscriptions with RSS feeds; found a way to send links from Apple News to Pocket, saving selected items to read on my Kobo; and put my public reading log on indefinite hiatus but you still can subscribe directly to my Pocket feed.
📜 You might or might not know me from such former projects as The Myra Stein Underground Press, Stop S314, The Millennium Cafe, Portland Communique, Can’t Stop the Serenity, and The Belmont Goats; or from the cruft-free presentation of Mark Twain’s The War Prayer I’ve been hosting online for twenty years.
🗣️ Rolling Stone emphasized my “long black eyelashes”, “face that sees very little sun”, and “quick wit”; Mike Doughty said that Soul Coughing was “playing it all” for me; Bruce Sterling referred to me as a “punk”; and a Portland public relations professional called me a “sissy”.
🔗 You can send me electronic mail, shoot me a text message, read my blog posts, browse my photo stream, check if I’m on IRC (although I’m likely /away), shop for either a disgruntled t-shirt or a cool lemur, read my asocial manifesto, or surprise my cats.
🛠️ This page was inspired by /now pages and is updated by hand at least once every week and served to you over the web; this domain is named for my Belly-inspired, mid-90s, first-ever internet handle.
*Autism spectrum, generalized anxiety, obsessive-compulsive, sensory processing, adjustment, aphantasia, developmental coordination, severely deficient autobiographical memory.